The 5 Stages of Cleaning

2 Mar

  1. Optimism
    This isn’t that bad. I can totally do this. I’ll put some peppy music on, pull my hair back, push up my sleeves. I’ll bet I can get this done in 2 hours, tops. I am good!
  2. Devastation
    MY. GOD. There’s no end to the mess! Who am I kidding? I can’t do this I can’t do this I can’t do this. Where did it all come from? Where do I put it? Why do I have one red shoelace? Why am I keeping every birthday card I’ve ever gotten? Ewww–why is there so much dust under the bed? This is horrible. HORRIBLE! The end is not near! What do I do? What is to become of me? Panic! PANIC!
  3. Avoidance
    Okay, breathe. I’ll just take a little break. I need to detox. I’m hungry–I should eat lunch. I’ll be more motivated to clean once I’m fed. Maybe I’ll turn the tv on while I’m eating. I don’t want to eat alone, it will be a nice little bit of company. Oh, and the dogs probably need walked. I’ll just eat a little something, watch a little something, and walk the dogs. All necessary.
  4. Guilt
    Oh no–it HASN’T been 2 hours, has it? What am I doing? I should have been cleaning this whole time! I’m so bad! I can’t stick to anything! I said I would be done by now–I’ve wasted time! I can’t do anything else now–this is hanging over my head. Bad Bad Bad!
  5. Resourcefulness
    I’ll just jam things under the bed. Yeah…nobody’s going to look under the bed. And the closet! I’ll put everything in the closet and close the door! Piles! I’ll make piles! They look neater than everything just spread out everywhere….maybe it will look like my piles are part of a system. What are cupboards and drawers and closets for, if not to hide all this crap?

292 Responses to “The 5 Stages of Cleaning”

  1. Chinasaur March 2, 2011 at 8:59 pm #

    Sometimes I will get stuck at step 1 and 2, then just quit. What you need is an organized roommate like the one we have in Italy!

    • acleansurface March 4, 2011 at 2:29 pm #

      I WAS the organized roommate once! I guess I still am, but now I am called a wife and mother.

  2. Oh My Words! March 3, 2011 at 11:29 pm #

    Yes, it’s much easier to clean with an inspiration or motivator
    We should have a roommate reunion in a clean, organized place! 🙂

    • Maureen March 4, 2011 at 2:24 pm #

      HILARIOUS! I love it!!

  3. Mikalee Byerman March 4, 2011 at 10:13 am #

    Awesome! “This mess is a place” — I think that’s my new mantra. 🙂

  4. The Simple Life of a Country Man's Wife March 4, 2011 at 10:18 am #

    Have you been hanging around my place or something?! I so go through those stages. It really amazes me when I clean under the couch (wood floors) and bed and kitchen appliances. So many dust bunnies!

  5. ElenaSC March 4, 2011 at 10:21 am #

    I get to all 5 feelings… in that order….every single day!

  6. B.C. Young March 4, 2011 at 10:27 am #

    Ha-ha. This is funny, but so true!

  7. Isabella Louise Anderson March 4, 2011 at 10:27 am #

    What an awesome blog post! 🙂

  8. carolyn4u March 4, 2011 at 10:31 am #

    Man, can I relate to this one or what? Totally enjoyed the read. Thanks for giving me some long awaited grins and making my day happier!

  9. minimrs March 4, 2011 at 10:36 am #

    I make piles and then slip them under anything i can find… sofas, cabinets, beds… shall we call it minimalist??! Not sure what happens when i run out of sofa storage…

    Great post… and v true!

  10. boodlesmom March 4, 2011 at 10:36 am #

    Awesome! I’ve started my spring cleaning this week and this is exactly how it’s felt!

  11. Jennifer Avventura March 4, 2011 at 10:39 am #

    I felt like I was talking to myself. Are you a libra by chance? Awesome post, thanks for the smile. Congrats on being Freshly Pressed.

  12. CrystalSpins March 4, 2011 at 10:39 am #

    Nice…I usually stick as stage 3. Good stuff.


  13. Sebastien A Girl March 4, 2011 at 10:42 am #

    And I always thought it was just me. My newest ‘system’ is to leave everything in a huge abstract pile on the floor and not move anything, that way nothing is lost, and if a bomb hits the house it won’t be a wasted effort. 🙂

  14. Service Jockey March 4, 2011 at 10:43 am #

    Fairly accurate. Minus pulling back my hair, I basically go through the same process whenever I’m doing dishes, laundry, or really anything I don’t want to do.

  15. Leah Dotten March 4, 2011 at 10:44 am #

    How did you get inside my head?!?!?!?

  16. jaredblakedicroce March 4, 2011 at 10:45 am #

    Step one: find an empty oil drum.
    Step two: Fill with nonessential from the house.
    Step three: Douse with lighter fluid.
    Step four: Cleaning’s done!
    Glad i could help 🙂

    • 3Hudd's March 9, 2011 at 11:47 am #

      Ha, that’s my husbands idea of spring cleaing. If you’re allowed to burn without neighbours complaining it WILL be burnt!! lol

  17. Jessica March 4, 2011 at 10:46 am #

    Great article! You had me laughing out loud. I feel better knowing others are just as bad as I am.

  18. Deli Lanoux, Ed.D. March 4, 2011 at 10:46 am #

    Oh, I love it!!!

    I can so relate!!!

  19. countoncross March 4, 2011 at 10:53 am #

    This is me….so much mess I don’t know how to start. 🙂

  20. Abigail March 4, 2011 at 10:54 am #

    With my brother coming back from college, and bringing four friends to stay the night, my mom has gone into panic mode about how much everything has to be cleaned. Unfortunately, we don’t have the solution of shoving everything into piles and cabinets, because we don’t have any storage in our house and all our pile places are already used by other things. 😀 So as soon as I’m done at college here, I’m off to help her.

  21. bluemixer March 4, 2011 at 10:58 am #

    I always skip step 1 and stop at step 3. LOL

  22. Jackson Rodgers March 4, 2011 at 11:02 am #

    I am usually best at Stage 3, avoidance. Also, there is a stage 6 called “Fascination”. I can watch with fascination when someone else is cleaning (as long as I don’t have to help).

  23. singlegirlie March 4, 2011 at 11:04 am #

    Have you been spying on me? Is there a 12-step recovery program? Or any number recovery program?

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 8:31 pm #

      haha I haven’t been spying, I swear! No 12-step program at the moment, but at least we know we have a support group!

  24. notesfromrumbleycottage March 4, 2011 at 11:09 am #

    I have found that if I have a party every month, I am forced to clean the main part of the house. It is only when I go into the recesses og my children’s closets that the panic attacks really begin.

    • NCDesigns March 6, 2011 at 5:12 pm #

      LOL, this is me! I’ll invite grandma and grandpa to come and spend the night…this sends the kids into panic mode as well and they start cleaning their butts off! Works everytime!

  25. anjobanjo22 March 4, 2011 at 11:15 am #

    I love this! It’s like you’ve watched me attempt a cleaning session. I think so many people can relate to this!

  26. liveinhusband March 4, 2011 at 11:18 am #

    This reminds me of one of Bob Dylan’s interviews. In the 1980s, Dylan released some of his weakest work, and many blame studio production rather than the material. It seemed that he would always start optimistically and then he would go through several stages before just putting out another weak 80s album.

    At the time, I think he said “my aim starts wide and ends narrow.”

  27. Maggie March 4, 2011 at 11:25 am #

    I always get stuck at stage 3 and nothing ever gets done, haha!

  28. J Roycroft March 4, 2011 at 11:30 am #

    I once owned a commercial cleaning company. I’ll never forget the first job. I quoted a price of $300 for what I thought would take 2 hrs work. It took 7 hours to complete. I found out real quick that cleaning takes a lot longer than planned and is harder than I realized.

  29. Liz March 4, 2011 at 11:30 am #

    Great post! I wrote a post called, “Do You Stuff Things in Closets and Drawers?” I swing from avoidance to optimism and no longer feel guilty about it. I’ve decided that I’m not raising a house–I’m raising kids and if they are learning, growing, and experimenting, the house cannot look perfectly clean at all times and unlived in. 🙂
    Congrats for being published on Freshly Pressed!

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 8:42 pm #

      That sounds like a very healthy (and happy) philosophy! I’ll have to check out your post!

  30. hunterpinehurst March 4, 2011 at 11:34 am #

    I do usually end with guilt. There is not place to put all that stuff.

  31. Maureen March 4, 2011 at 11:35 am #

    My gosh. You captured my cleaning experiences exactly. Spot on!

  32. courtneyryanne March 4, 2011 at 11:36 am #

    I can’t clean until all of my house is completely empty, and then the steps usually proceed just as you had described them. (Except towards the end someone normally comes home to find me weeping in a pile of cleaning supplies on the floor.)

  33. panninastja March 4, 2011 at 11:38 am #

    OOooh, yeah! My fave – 3 🙂

  34. belleofthecarnival March 4, 2011 at 11:56 am #

    Hahaha! It sounds like my morning! Avoidance and procrastination are necessary survival skills when it comes to cleaning 🙂

  35. Silky Sienna March 4, 2011 at 12:03 pm #

    LOL- this is my dilemna exactly! So much so, I devoted my daily Postaday Challenge (my a.d.d. project) to this and this alone! And it is working- Like you, I am overwhelmed by “where did it all come from?” And yet, I most certainly am convinced “I need everything!” Glad to know I am not the only one who feels this way. We are NOT bad people. Maybe just not ‘Domestic Godesses”.

    • Shan Kelly March 5, 2011 at 2:08 am #

      But do you really need everything. I know I don’t, but I get stuck trying to throw stuff away.

  36. Reggie March 4, 2011 at 12:06 pm #

    Brilliantly written. I couldn’t help nodding all the way. And congratulations on being Freshly Pressed!

  37. All County Insurance - Brea, California March 4, 2011 at 12:11 pm #

    Piles in the closet look so much better than everything scattered out on the floor in the middle of the room! I love this post and the 5 stages of cleaning! Congrats on being FP!

  38. She's a Maineiac March 4, 2011 at 12:15 pm #

    Hilarious! Seriously, that’s what closets are for…people who can’t seem to conquer the clutter. I cringe when I dare open one of my closets for fear the avalanche from the mountain of crap in there might kill me. Congrats on FP.

  39. vampjezzc March 4, 2011 at 12:16 pm #

    Love the list, it is funny to have someone else put down the stages that I go through all the time. What is interesting is you could also just reword a few things and make it the five stages of exercising, because it really does correlate.

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 9:05 pm #

      Several readers have pointed out that these stages could apply to homework, but this is the first comparison I’ve seen to exercising–so true! Although I might change #5 to Delusion or something like that 🙂

  40. caterpillar March 4, 2011 at 12:19 pm #

    Good Lord, you might as well have been talking about me there…I go through all these stages, and then I have another stage…Denial…where I refuse to consider the mess a mess….:)

  41. Kim Holloway March 4, 2011 at 12:26 pm #

    I just found your blog through Freshly Pressed, and I love your hilarious take on house cleaning. I, myself, have gone through all five stages many a time.

    My former roommate resorted to buying tiara-style party hats and inviting me to a “kitchen party,” wherein all the guests were expected to clean. There weren’t even snacks!

    When you get to step five, a dust ruffle really comes in handy. I’ve extolled their virtues here:

    I’m looking forward to catching up on your posts!

    • charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 6:35 pm #

      I think that’s how MerryMaids started….

      spread the humor:

  42. atiredwife March 4, 2011 at 12:35 pm #

    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!

    Thank you for the much needed giggle today. I have a step in there that you dont. It’s the “hey, I’m just going to catch up on my TIVO’d programs for an hour and then I’ll really be ready to knock this cleaning out. And then sometimes I ‘accidentially’ fall asleep while I’m catching up on my TIVO’s programs.

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 9:18 pm #

      tv is definitely an enabler when it comes to not cleaning…

  43. dancing oranges March 4, 2011 at 12:35 pm #

    LOL love it!!! so true! i started this morning on phase 1, and im chilling on phase 3 😀

  44. runningforautism March 4, 2011 at 12:39 pm #

    There’s a stage 6 in my household: FULL CIRCLE. Five minutes after you’ve finished jamming stuff in closets and shoving boxes under your bed, your kids come along and dump it all over the floor again!

  45. Pink Combat Boots March 4, 2011 at 12:43 pm #

    Yep, that about sums it up. 🙂 After cleaning all morning, and afternoon, this totally made my day 🙂

  46. Young Wifey March 4, 2011 at 12:44 pm #

    I do like to have music on too… but I have shoving things in cabinets and closets. I’d rather have neat and orderly drawers… Not if only I could get Hubster to help…

  47. faithandstagefright March 4, 2011 at 12:50 pm #

    Um, this is totally, exactly my cleaning method. I don’t know how anyone EVER has a clean house, or even a clean room. I need to hire a professional. 🙂

    • spiritinmatter March 5, 2011 at 6:45 am #

      I agree… I’ve always felt that people with impeccableble cleaning skills have taken a knowledge or understanding class that I somehow missed. The “what to do with everything” is undoubtedly the worst part!

  48. Michelle March 4, 2011 at 12:55 pm #

    Your words made me laugh out loud! I can totally identify with the 5 stages of cleaning. 🙂

  49. elenamusic March 4, 2011 at 12:56 pm #

    You’re spot on! Haha! Literally! I’ve been through all of those phases. Great post!

  50. Barb March 4, 2011 at 12:59 pm #

    Hahaha – hilarious – yes, this is so ME too. Love it.

  51. jillfeyka March 4, 2011 at 1:15 pm #

    This is a riot! I once felt your ‘pain’, being the mother to two (now adult) sons.

    Keep the faith and thanks for making me laugh!

  52. EveMarieR March 4, 2011 at 1:21 pm #

    Thank you for making my day! This is exactly what I go through every time I clean. So funny!

  53. rtcrita March 4, 2011 at 1:22 pm #

    I needed this and the comic relief it provided as I prepare to attack the house and all the “stuff” I have no place for, but somehow find a temporary place to move it to until I find a “better” place for it — also, temporary.

  54. aunaqui March 4, 2011 at 1:32 pm #

    “Piles! I’ll make piles!”

    Ahhhh, yes – resourcefulness.

    YOU are a very funny, talented writer.
    Totally made me smile. 🙂

    And by the way.. turning some peppy music on and dressing like a baggy bum really does motivate one (atleast me) to clean fast, efficiently and beast-like.

    Aun Aqui

    • charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 6:38 pm #

      When cleaning time comes, I just post the For Sale sign…

      spread the humor:

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 9:26 pm #

      thanks a lot! Oh and you’re right, the peppy music is key!

  55. Mila March 4, 2011 at 1:34 pm #

    LOL! This is funny and true!

  56. jessiethought March 4, 2011 at 1:46 pm #

    You just have to do it. And chores aren’t that bad.

  57. Michelle Wood March 4, 2011 at 1:55 pm #

    I know that feeling. Then I discovered
    It’s awesome. 🙂

  58. Ascentive March 4, 2011 at 1:56 pm #

    You sound exactly as I am. I tend to try to ‘hide’ stuff instead of actually cleaning. I also can only go for a couple of hours at a time.

  59. melissasmeanderings March 4, 2011 at 2:02 pm #

    I’ve been there so many times…I’ve wished to have a dog to walk!!

  60. Rue March 4, 2011 at 2:19 pm #

    I’m at the guilt stage.

  61. lifetasteslikefood March 4, 2011 at 2:21 pm #

    Love it!! Went through these exact steps last night with my room! Still not totally clean. I will finish today!!! Maybe… 🙂 Thanks for posting!

  62. stylistnc March 4, 2011 at 2:24 pm #

    Oh I love this. Cleaning is a never ending thing and I try my best not to feel too guilty that I don’t have that perfect house. Great post.

  63. dogsear March 4, 2011 at 2:25 pm #

    My wife & I split the cleaning duties. Somehow I got stuck with cleaning bathrooms. Devastation is indeed what happens every time I take on the shower. It’s the worst chore there is, I think. Especially, when I put it off and it just gets worse. I guess you call that Avoidance.

  64. monicastangledweb March 4, 2011 at 2:25 pm #

    Why bother? I long ago gave up on housecleaning. Now I pay others to do it. It eats into my food budget, but it’s worth every penny! Congrats on being freshly pressed. Loved the illustration you have here.

  65. My Camera, My Friend March 4, 2011 at 2:27 pm #

    I went to a college that required us to clean our rooms extensively in the middle of every semester. Sometimes, it followed the pattern you outlined, ony though people would makes piles in their cars instead.

  66. manysimplegifts March 4, 2011 at 2:34 pm #

    This gave me a great laugh! Thank you!

  67. notacrazycatlady March 4, 2011 at 2:35 pm #

    Is it possible to feel all 5 at once?

  68. beyondanomie March 4, 2011 at 2:40 pm #

    I usually end up drifting into doing the housework. I start off just cleaning one small area, then end up thinking, “well I’ve started. Might as well do it all now”. It’s the procrastination of the chore that’s the worst thing.

    Maybe it’s life’s way of telling me it’s time to get a maid…

  69. whenquiet March 4, 2011 at 2:42 pm #

    I can’t go to bed with unclean dishes in the sink..And I can’t sit down to eat if I see crumbs on the floor! The folk at our shop/business think I have a clean tic!! But, you should see our guest room! Two baskets of clothes that need ironing. My motto! Do what you can, and what you can’t, leave.

    • charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 6:45 pm #

      How about: “Do what you can, and what you can’t, leave for the cleaning lady”…

      spread the humor.

  70. zenmamajo March 4, 2011 at 2:53 pm #

    honestly – after the kids arrived – that’s why i don’t clean much – i’m content with things (kinda) being in their places *hahah*

  71. beautysdaughter March 4, 2011 at 3:12 pm #

    haha, you summed the stages up so accurately i’m glad i’m not the only one.

  72. ginadebacker March 4, 2011 at 3:16 pm #

    I usually get to Step 4 and quit. 🙂 Thanks for the laughs!

  73. SAS Fiction Girl March 4, 2011 at 3:16 pm #

    Ah yes – I recognize this, especially Stage 5. My version of cleaning is rearranging the things I own. I just keep finding new places to stuff the, uh, stuff, and the room looks cleaner than before. -Jen

  74. holyfrickindates March 4, 2011 at 3:19 pm #

    This is a perfectly accurate look at my five stages of cleaning. Well done. Shoving things under the bed and in the closet is always the answer. 🙂

  75. Through The Screen Door March 4, 2011 at 3:19 pm #

    This is frighteningly accurate! Whose been peeking through my windows?! lol

  76. bluecloverbelle March 4, 2011 at 3:24 pm #

    Never mind needing inspiration to clean, i use it as an excuse not to study!

  77. Angel March 4, 2011 at 3:42 pm #

    Oh yeah, been there for sure. Loved this, so true.

  78. tanyaisasquirrel March 4, 2011 at 3:57 pm #

    ahahahahah, piles!!!! I’m famous for my piles of rubbish!!! 😀

  79. thislittlebirdie March 4, 2011 at 4:12 pm #

    We must be long lost twins…..this was exactly my day! At least I’m not alone… 🙂

  80. ohmeohmyvintage March 4, 2011 at 4:38 pm #

    I encouraged my partner to go fishing with our dog for the afternoon so I could have a good ol’ deap clean of the house… I got as far as step 3 before I panicked in a world of step 4 and rushed to complete step 5 before he got back! 5 minutes later I sat amidst a sea of fishing equipment and wet dog mess (plus the stench) – I was right back at step 1… Humph!

  81. Just Ramblin' Pier March 4, 2011 at 4:38 pm #

    After a long Friday at work, this was my first read of the night. Glad I read it… made me laugh as it is SO true! Dust bunnies beware!

  82. cockamamiecarnival March 4, 2011 at 4:41 pm #

    It’s even worse after you eat, you’re so full from your “little lunch” that you take a nap. 4 hours roll by, nadda done.

  83. holessence March 4, 2011 at 5:42 pm #

    I love it! CONGRATULATIONS on being Freshly Pressed!

  84. Fox@n March 4, 2011 at 5:43 pm #

    Great post. I use all five of those hahahha .. I try to keep everything clean but that never works out …… So i do it every week like fix my closet.

  85. Melody In Wonderland March 4, 2011 at 5:58 pm #

    Totally me..:p

  86. princesayasmine March 4, 2011 at 6:39 pm #

    Hehe. This is so funny and very true.

  87. theamberlight March 4, 2011 at 6:41 pm #

    A great post deserving of Freshly Pressed!!! What is so great? The realism!!! EVERYONE who reads this has done this, if not during cleaning then some other dreaded chore :o)….so typical Human nature!!! You hit it out of the park with this one…right to home! Thanks for the smile and laugh!!!

  88. mdayjewels March 4, 2011 at 6:56 pm #

    OMG!!! Where just looking into my head or what??? Lol!

    Congratulations on making it on Freshly Pressed!! 🙂

  89. Blythe Grady March 4, 2011 at 7:21 pm #

    Oh my….this is sooo me!!!! Every day (almost), I say I’m going to clean and every day, before I know it, it’s time to pick up the children, make dinner, etc. Great piece….thanks!

  90. Michelle Howard March 4, 2011 at 7:26 pm #

    I love this post 🙂 Very original and I so totally found myself somewhere in the middle!

  91. Julia March 4, 2011 at 7:41 pm #

    I’m afraid number 3 is usually my number 1. I was just looking around my house, thinking, what a mess, Oh well, there are a million other more interesting things to do than clean it up.

  92. creativeconfessions March 4, 2011 at 7:49 pm #

    Hahaha! I tend to move straight to Step 5, being the messy, disheveled and disorganized person I am! Thanks for the post!

  93. Carla @ Chasing Cakes March 4, 2011 at 8:00 pm #

    So funny! I’m going to try to clean my place tomorrow, so I’ll be keeping your funny list in mind. But notice how I said I’d do it tomorrow? Ah, procrastination…

  94. Insomniac-Girl March 4, 2011 at 9:13 pm #

    hmm, this reminds me of my post.
    the stages a student undergoes during a test!
    do read!

  95. foziaatmind March 4, 2011 at 9:18 pm #

    Love this. Its so absolutely the way I work when it comes to cleaning.

  96. BB_Baker March 4, 2011 at 9:20 pm #

    Awesome, great post. Had me laughing. Congrats on Freshly Pressed

  97. Nicole March 4, 2011 at 9:28 pm #

    Bless your heart! Thank you! Thank you! I have silently said these exact words for a week now….you read my mind!!! Seriously, I finally unloaded the dishwasher, only to reload again, last night after the dirty dishes had sat in the sink for a week. My husband asked if I was growing a science experiment. Nope, just can’t find the motivation ~ or want to ~ to start cleaning. IT. NEVER. ENDS. EVER!!!!!

    Love your blog, so glad I “stumbled” upon it – will definitely visit again.

  98. smilesndreams March 4, 2011 at 9:45 pm #

    Great post! Sounds so familiar though. I go through this most weekends when it’s that ‘cleaning’ time. I’ve created those piles and hid them under the bed and in closets too! 🙂

  99. Pollyanna March 4, 2011 at 9:57 pm #

    I love it! I have four little boys. The piles are taking over the house. Cleaners should be subsidised by the government. xx

  100. A Regular Teenager March 4, 2011 at 10:15 pm #

    it so fully reminds me of my study moments: a little something i wrote about procrastination

  101. flippingchannels March 4, 2011 at 10:32 pm #

    I think my steps go a bit more like this:

    Step 1- Put things away as you go so it never gets bad enough to merit “cleaning time”.

    Step 2- Disregard Step 1.

    Step 3- Crap. How did I end up here again?

  102. loveleyrambles March 4, 2011 at 10:32 pm #

    I can’t even make it to step one. I get stuck on the pre-step of thinking “man, I should really clean this place up”…and then I end up watching an entire season of glee instead…

  103. realanonymousgirl2011 March 4, 2011 at 11:27 pm #

    I think this is the point where you call in some back up and hire a cleaning lady…even if its just once.

  104. avikabir March 4, 2011 at 11:41 pm #

    Been there, done that…hhaha…;) super appealing…
    I gotta photoblog here too check it out sometime…
    Keep up the good work

  105. makingup3000 March 4, 2011 at 11:48 pm #

    Glad to know so many people are in the same boat. Love that post.

  106. lemonadeandlemoncake March 5, 2011 at 1:18 am #

    this is my life.

  107. eof737 March 5, 2011 at 1:20 am #

    I thoroughly enjoyed your stages… Hysterical and … familiar! 🙂

  108. Rachel March 5, 2011 at 1:27 am #

    I’ve been avoiding cleaning the bathrooms by cleaning the windows inside and out. Hrmmm…

  109. Ladystou March 5, 2011 at 2:10 am #

    Funny and perfect. And actually very, very true…for the most of us.

  110. aparnasdotcom March 5, 2011 at 2:26 am #

    Well said…Something that I go through almost every weekend…but I realise very often at end of Stage three, I just need some company to get me through the cleaning…If I have company…I do manage to finish it!!…Yay for me!

    • Gareth March 5, 2011 at 2:47 am #

      We’ve all been there.

  111. leadinglight March 5, 2011 at 2:51 am #

    I get to stage 3 and jump to 5 and then feel 4 :p

  112. Gabrielle March 5, 2011 at 4:21 am #

    I completely hate cleaning. Step 1 would never ever happen in my world. But once I start cleaning I am completely relaxed and can only go 1 speed: till it’s done.

  113. stillscapes March 5, 2011 at 4:28 am #

    This is great! I was up at 4:15 a.m. cleaning and now getting ready to iron! Love it! Glad to see you here!

  114. tinkerbelle86 March 5, 2011 at 6:03 am #

    hahaha the worst thing is when you pull out all the cupbaords in an attempt to spring clean and then get fed up, but you cant stop because you have made such a mess!!

  115. griffinshoney March 5, 2011 at 6:13 am #

    So me!

  116. Ann March 5, 2011 at 6:19 am #

    Funny and perfect. And actually very, very true…for the most of us.

  117. Ian Webster March 5, 2011 at 6:39 am #

    I bought a book. Wonderful book. It even has a subtitle, so it must be proper. It’s called, “A Perfect Mess: The Hidden Benefits of Disorder.”
    And they quote Einstein: “If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk?”
    Don’t you like it already?
    If not freshly dusted, you at least got Freshly Pressed. Now THAT’s something. Well done.

  118. spiritinmatter March 5, 2011 at 6:40 am #

    I love this post! I could see me in every line. I’m needing to clean my house today and somehow I don’t feel so alone, now, in my “everyone must be having more fun than me today” misery. Thanks for sharing!

  119. Holly Vandervort March 5, 2011 at 6:52 am #

    Haha! This is so me today. I am currently stuck on Stage 3, which is why I am reading this instead of cleaning. Stages 1 and 2 took about five minutes to get through, but I’ve been on Stage 3 for a looong time 😀

    Great post, thanks for the laugh!

  120. mystifiedghost March 5, 2011 at 6:57 am #

    You have hit the nail right on the head with this. It certainly sums up how I feel when cleaning. Resourcefulness is certainly my favourite.

  121. CultureChoc2010 March 5, 2011 at 7:50 am #

    Great post!

  122. heatherlgraham March 5, 2011 at 8:06 am #

    So my life, well up to step five. I haven’t resorted to cramming everything in closets or under the bed yet. I just don’t invite anybody over! My kids seem to think it’s supposed to look like this, so they don’t mind. (They’d better not, since they are the ones making it a natural disater zone!)

    Great post!

  123. pattyabr March 5, 2011 at 9:09 am #

    You need to add another step, Motivation. Sometimes the only thing that motivates me to clean is that the dust is so thick that I’m sneezing incessantly. For me, Overwhelm would replace your Devastation step.

    Good luck on your spring cleaning. My basement is getting remodeled and there is dust is everywhere and my furniture is tossed in bedrooms and storage shelving is taking up one side of the garage. Overwhelm city.

  124. The Compulsive Writer March 5, 2011 at 9:18 am #

    Here is the deal…the reason most wives/mothers don’t clean is because we are all sick of cleaning the same thing we just cleaned up. Can’t things just stay clean for one day? Is that too much to ask? With that said…I’m number 3. And I never feel guilty. And if I shove things under the bed..its like well, what the heck were your things doing in my bedroom in the first place?

    Love this post. Now… I’m looking at my kitchen floor and it is real dirty, I should probably clean it. Nah, it can wait until I’m done bloggin’. 🙂

  125. Ava Aston's Muckery March 5, 2011 at 9:39 am #

    I can’t get motivate to even get to step one – just sayin’.

    If I don’t watch out someday I will have to add an episode of “Hoarders” to my acting resume.



  126. Meanwhile, back at the ranch... March 5, 2011 at 9:42 am #

    This is right on. I am on phase 3 right now and plan to be there all day, having skipped phase 1 and 2…hmmmm.
    Cute blog!

  127. Debbi is 24atHeart March 5, 2011 at 9:43 am #

    So ABSOLUTELY true! Congrats on being Freshly Pressed!

  128. Valentina March 5, 2011 at 10:27 am #

    ))))That’s soo true!!! But sometimes there are days I just “avoid” seeing anything but give up at 10 pm and start cleaning.)))) I wish I was like my aunt who even washes her porch and outside tiles with a hose( she has tiles instead of grass) even when its RAINING!!!But all of my aunts and mom are like Monica from Friends. And I am the lazy duckling))

  129. notizbuchfragmente March 5, 2011 at 10:28 am #

    I SO had to laugh about this …

    Know exactly how you feel; except that I don’t have a dog. 😉

    Tanks for sharing!

  130. Delanie Holton-Fessler March 5, 2011 at 10:58 am #

    Amen! My clothes pile is out of control.

  131. leoroaring March 5, 2011 at 11:19 am #

    Oh I hear ya! I have lived this and also have lived through the 5 stages of cooking….

  132. Mona B March 5, 2011 at 11:19 am #

    hahahaha I absolutely adore this! it’s so true!!

  133. tiallarising March 5, 2011 at 11:52 am #

    hahahaha that’s great. Congrats on FP!


  134. rohitmaiya March 5, 2011 at 12:01 pm #

    So very true.

    I remember that during my school days when I was a boarder, I would stack all the things into the mosquito net till it gets to heavy that it almost touches my belly when I am asleep. [The warden could see under the bed, but not in the mosquite net]

  135. ladybugxxvii March 5, 2011 at 12:11 pm #

    i love it. it’s a series i go through everyday. minus the dogs.

  136. rprothero24 March 5, 2011 at 12:17 pm #

    “2 hours have passed…. I should go clean again” My thoughts right at this moment.

    • charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 2:58 pm #

      You sound like Rain man….

      spread the humor:

  137. DC March 5, 2011 at 12:21 pm #

    I’ve given up on step #1 and tend to just walk about gnashing my teeth from the get-go.

  138. gradealpha March 5, 2011 at 12:24 pm #

    I clean one room at a time for a sense of accomplishment!

  139. Adjoa-Gennesaret Sutota March 5, 2011 at 12:32 pm #

    Forget cleaning – have you been introduced to moving? Oy vey. 🙂

  140. maryct70 March 5, 2011 at 12:37 pm #

    Made me chuckle out loud. I am right between stages 3 and 4 as I am reading, and it sounds much like my life every Saturday!
    Congrats on being Freshly Pressed!

  141. Averne March 5, 2011 at 12:46 pm #

    I automatically default to Step 5. Then three months later, I start wondering where all my cutlery, bank statements, summer clothes and that invoice from my landlord for the hot water bill went. I need to hire a professional organizer just to follow me around every day, keeping my apartment in order!

    Found this entry through Freshly Pressed. Congrats!

  142. terraspencer March 5, 2011 at 1:24 pm #

    I think this is the same for doing homework too! 🙂

  143. Heather March 5, 2011 at 1:42 pm #

    Love. This. It is the most accurate description of the process of cleaning I have ever read. Hahaha! Good stuff.

  144. Mildred Lewis March 5, 2011 at 2:25 pm #

    Brilliant. Same goes for work as well.

  145. 1andy4 March 5, 2011 at 2:28 pm #

    My wife likes cleaning, no sorry she loves cleaning, no that’s not quite right, she’s obsessed with cleaning, I think her mom bought her a toy hoover when she was three and the rest is history.

    You must DE-CLUTTER it is good for the soul and makes your house look fab but then again you may need that book about rock-climbing you bought in third grade – NO YOU DON’T, BIN IT.

    You ARE BAD but in a cute way.


    COME ON!

  146. jessicaber March 5, 2011 at 2:39 pm #

    I love that. I live in a 2 bedroom apartment…have lived here for 5 years and no matter how hard I try there is always one bed unmade, dirty dishes in the sink and atleast one dirty linoleum floor.

  147. I Made You A Mixtape March 5, 2011 at 2:57 pm #

    LMAO!!! So funny! And celevr… you have captured, what I believe, most of us go through when faced with the reality that no, you cannot put off cleaning forever….lol. Loved this post!!

  148. Siobhan March 5, 2011 at 3:21 pm #

    I don’t clean. At least, unless a sudden urge takes me, I can go for months without doing it voluntarily. It’s now been accepted that I cook and take care of the bills and my boyfriend does the cleaning.

  149. ryoko861 March 5, 2011 at 4:10 pm #

    LMAO!!! Isn’t it the truth!?? I go through all that too. I don’t drink coffee, but if I did, that’s exactly how I would sound.

    You’re too funny!

  150. Margaret Ivory March 5, 2011 at 4:12 pm #

    I just cleaned and cleared out 50 years of living at my mother’s old house as she has moved to a new house. I went through all of those stages but I think you missed one – The Crying Stage …lol.

  151. lisafeg March 5, 2011 at 4:24 pm #

    Well you have summed it up! Thanks for sharing. Big question is why does the mess have to get soooooo big. A least I’ll have a laugh at myself next time I hit stage 3!

  152. Ash March 5, 2011 at 4:32 pm #

    You could change the words around and this could be called the five stages of homework. 😛

  153. Currie Rose March 5, 2011 at 4:48 pm #

    This is soooooooooooo cute! Thanks for sharing. 🙂

  154. Colin L Beadon March 5, 2011 at 4:57 pm #

    My own recipe for cleaning. Just don’t think about it. Get down and ‘Do it’, and you’ll glow with pride when it’s done. It is the thinking about it, which destroys you.

  155. skybambi March 5, 2011 at 5:56 pm #

    This is hilarious. I totally relate 🙂

  156. Sixthirtythree March 5, 2011 at 7:53 pm #

    Yep, that’s exactly what I do.
    Congrats on being freshly pressed!

  157. carissayufita March 5, 2011 at 8:54 pm #

    lol,great article. cleaning always rough for me. and i found out it’s not only me who have problem with cleaning 🙂 love it.

  158. saltybi11 March 5, 2011 at 9:03 pm #

    lol… this writing style is a neat mental point of view! Nice

    • Holy crap! I'm someone's mom! March 5, 2011 at 9:26 pm #

      Found this through FP and loved it. I felt like you were describing me. I get stuck at number 3. I’ll watch one tv show and then start thinking up excuses to help me convince myself that I can watch the next one. I’ll say to myself, “It’s just another 30 minutes…I can make that up.” And then that 30 minute show ends and I desperately grasp at more excuses to help me convince myself I can sit on the couch a bit longer. Procrastination at its finest. This is one reason why I believe I’d be a terrible stay at home mom.

  159. Reinitha Lasmana March 5, 2011 at 9:35 pm #

    Wow,this is hillarious and I really enjoy it! It strucked me the most when I came to point #3 and so on till the rest…
    Then I reread and realise that this is all about me… the mental state I go through when it comes to cleaning!
    Glad to know I am not so alone in this world. Lol!

  160. Not Happenin On My Watch | Blog March 5, 2011 at 9:39 pm #

    I’m there now! Thanks! I feel better now. Good Lawd!! How long will it take? =D

  161. lostincompositionland March 5, 2011 at 10:50 pm #

    wow, that sounds just like me! I’ve pretty much given up on having a nice, clean room because of all the stuff I accumulated from college, plus the stuff I already had. I’ve given some away but it doesn’t seem to have helped much.

  162. نعیمه March 6, 2011 at 12:14 am #

    I’m an Iranian. In Iran we have a tradition to clean every corner of the house before the new year. We call it “Shaking the House”. Our new year is on 21st of March.
    I was cleaning the whole kitchen and meanwhile surfing on net.
    Suddenly I say this post.
    It is funny. because you exactly described how I felt.
    You made my day.

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 9:36 pm #

      That seems like a nice tradition–a good way to start the new year, if you can manage it 🙂

      Glad I made your day! Good luck with the cleaning!

  163. AnastasiaVS March 6, 2011 at 4:25 am #

    This is great!

  164. Lili March 6, 2011 at 4:29 am #

    A mais pura verdade!
    So true!!

  165. Shrey March 6, 2011 at 4:45 am #

    Great Post…!!

  166. Earthianne March 6, 2011 at 5:31 am #

    You actually just described my spring cleaning ritual – every step! Great post, love your humor.

  167. stillroom March 6, 2011 at 5:32 am #

    My my friend and I talk on the phone a couple of times a week and discuss all of the things we have to do so our lives will be in perfect order. We both operate little antique & collectibles shops and trust me, we can’t believe all of the “things” that get stacked in piles that make sense at the time, boxes of mysterious things that made sense at the time they were put into the just gets nuts! Yeah, we talk a good game. Adult ADD.

  168. dearfolksie March 6, 2011 at 5:58 am #

    ROTFL!!! I feel like there has been hidden cameras in my house! The only thing that gets me motivated to get cleaning done is visitors. I work great under the pressure of time. So when it gets time to get cleaning done I invite friends over and work like a mad woman for 3 hours before they get there. However, I’m a new mom (my son is 10 weeks old) and I’m so tired from caring for him my social life has died down and the mess is piling up. Thanks for this post I’m going to share it 🙂

    • charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 2:21 pm #

      Research the Ten Second Tidy routine…

      spread the humor

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 7:02 pm #

      Yes, visitors are real motivators for cleaning, aren’t they? That’s actually the reason I was cleaning (and the reason I wrote this post), because a family friend was coming to stay.
      You have a 10 week old? Honey, don’t even bother cleaning, just try and catch some sleep when you can and enjoy your new bundle of joy!

  169. batikmania March 6, 2011 at 6:23 am #

    1-2-3. Usually all thing are as simple as 1-2-3. So does my cleaning habit. Got there already, and I leave the house that way most of the time. Ooh, you remind me to clean up things around. I think it’s time for me to leave my computer and start cleaning. OK the, get up, Dee, and do the 1-2-3 😉

  170. handhua March 6, 2011 at 6:26 am #

    same feeling, good!

  171. Handphone Review March 6, 2011 at 6:39 am #

    I have better approach for cleaning: categorize anything for their place. That way, sometimes hard works are not needed when cleaning, and sometimes it made cleaning is more fun!

    • charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 2:20 pm #

      Cleaning MORE FUN??? You definitely need to get out more…

      spread the humor:

  172. Jean March 6, 2011 at 6:55 am #

    Honest, any other topic to contemplate on? Life is too short to writing about cleaning up a room/house. You’ll find me on the bike or walking outdoors and write about that instead.

    Unless you’re moving to make a life change.

    • charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 2:18 pm #

      Yes, I agree… then we can discuss all the litter out there..

      spread the humor:

  173. annagrassini March 6, 2011 at 7:14 am #

    Exactly what I needed before I tackle my Sunday cleaning…in the meantime I am delaying the inevitable by cooking!

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 10:41 pm #

      I’ve always thought cooking is a great distraction because that way, no matter what else you get done, at least you’ll have something good to eat later!

  174. practicalsensibility March 6, 2011 at 8:39 am #

    love this…story of my life… 😀

  175. Richard March 6, 2011 at 9:05 am #

    Very good, reminds me of the five stages of death!

    • charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 2:14 pm #

      They are one in the same…..

      unless you’re Merry Maids…

      spread the humor:

  176. saltandnectar March 6, 2011 at 9:09 am #

    This is so funny and true that I could imagine it playing out in an episode of “I Love Lucy.” I totally fall prey to stages 3 and 4. Who doesn’t!?! I appreciate your witticism. Congrats on FP!

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 9:43 pm #

      Since “I Love Lucy” is one of my favorite shows I take this as a HUGE compliment 🙂

  177. somethingelsa March 6, 2011 at 9:14 am #

    Thanks for the laugh. I just tried to quickly vacuum my rug, only to find the brush needed cleaning so badly that I had to clean it in order to vacuum. I really need a new vacuum cleaner… or maybe I need to find somebody to do the vacuuming for me?

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 10:26 pm #

      isn’t it terrible when chores spawn other chores? 😛

  178. Pinata March 6, 2011 at 10:16 am #

    this is my sunday, very good post

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 10:28 pm #

      thanks! Hope you’re Sunday ended on a high note!

  179. Sonal Chopra March 6, 2011 at 10:28 am #

    Loved how you captured this dialogue with the mind 🙂 Very entertaining …. thanks for sharing & I’m so glad I found your blog.. congrats on FP!

  180. Sonia M. March 6, 2011 at 10:49 am #

    So funny and so true!

  181. lospuenzo March 6, 2011 at 10:57 am #

    Married with three kids (one to university, one in high school, the other in elementary). The GARAGE !! The GARAGE is the MOOONSTER of all cleanings and sorting! It’s the place from Hell. I have spent more time in frustration looking at that GARAGE and try to make more sense of it than in any other place. I strongly believe that projects like these should be done one hour a day for a few days, until things get under control…

    • charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 2:05 pm #

      What if we eliminate the garage and bring back the carport….Imagine the lovely view for the neighbors…

      spread the humor:

  182. glendenewolf March 6, 2011 at 10:57 am #

    I say throw it all away, then you don’t have to feel the guilt. Great post!

  183. wovenstrands March 6, 2011 at 11:21 am #

    lmao I LOVED this, it gave me a laugh. I thought I would take a break from my mess. I reached the Avoidance part hehe

  184. rubywe March 6, 2011 at 11:57 am #

    So true, so true

  185. intermittentblogger March 6, 2011 at 11:57 am #

    Mwahahahahahaha! If only this weren’t so true! Every weekend I think “ok, this weekend I really must do something about this mess (that has been hidden in cupboards since the last time I tried to do something about the mess).

  186. meowzersmusings March 6, 2011 at 12:18 pm #

    Wow, so it’s not just me? Your procrastinations are exactly the same!! NEVER look under the bed! With two longhaired kittens who play fight under there, it looks like there is an extra cat…albeit one that is smeared across the carpet.

  187. rebecaelisa March 6, 2011 at 12:27 pm #

    Oh my, this had me laughing! So true!!

  188. Megan March 6, 2011 at 12:56 pm #

    My exact thoughts the other day while I was cleaning my room! Hilarious, truthful post! amazing job and congrats on being FP! 🙂

  189. mythoughtsnotmyown March 6, 2011 at 1:21 pm #

    This is true and I follow all five stages also.

    • charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 1:57 pm #

      I think this is harder than a 12 step from AA…

  190. charlywalker March 6, 2011 at 1:55 pm #

    House cleaning is a dirty word.

    I’ve kicked my family out and moved the cleaning lady in….

    spread the humor:

  191. thundercows March 6, 2011 at 2:00 pm #

    That`s me, but you should add up the cursing and yelling part

  192. lotusanm March 6, 2011 at 2:48 pm #

    I love this because it describes me so well…I feel guilty for not cleaning even though I don’t actually have time for cleaning. That’s the worst kind of guilt, the inescapable never-ending kind. : (

  193. ladonnaslifelessons March 6, 2011 at 3:05 pm #

    Love this post – it is what I do at least once a week! lol

  194. Karen March 6, 2011 at 3:33 pm #

    It’s 6:27 p.m. on Sunday evening. I spent my weekend with Mr. Clean and his friends the scrubbing bubbles. I’m warn out! Those guys know how to P A R T Y!! But now I sit in my house that is sparkling clean. The loud music helped me dance and sing my way through. My heart is happy. I’d like to take another day off just to be still in my clean house.

  195. Mr.Cleaning March 6, 2011 at 4:14 pm #

    Clean no one likes xD. I think the need to invent a robot cleaners and run into everyday life. At this time, cleaners do not even appreciate very much to clean up.

  196. Grumpa Joe March 6, 2011 at 4:21 pm #

    One of my high priorities in life is “to simplify.” After my wife died, and I sold my house I was forced to purge. Although it sounds easy, I have accumulated enough junk in the past five years to have to start over.
    Great post!

  197. TheRomanticRealist March 6, 2011 at 4:28 pm #

    This sums up how I spent my entire day. Though I didn’t even get to step 5. I’m such a lazy bum.

    Now on to my shower… if I can motivate…

  198. Audra Taylor, CPA March 6, 2011 at 4:46 pm #

    This has been me TOO many times. Thanks for this, really made me laugh, and I’m going to go home right now and try to finish cleaning my kitchen…it’ll only take me 2 hours!

  199. Freedom, by the way March 6, 2011 at 4:59 pm #

    This is so me. Much to my husband’s chagrin!

  200. Sean Patrick Hazlett March 6, 2011 at 5:22 pm #

    My wife never got past stage 1.

  201. nobles123 March 6, 2011 at 5:57 pm #

    You wrote something for everyone. Great post.

  202. ksqred March 6, 2011 at 6:10 pm #

    This is hilarious because it’s exactly right. I was just cleaning out my room and I went through all 5 stages several times each day.

  203. 1hpb March 6, 2011 at 6:12 pm #

    glad I am not the only one that feels this way!

  204. marcys March 6, 2011 at 6:45 pm #

    This is totally wonderful! Am sending it to a few people who will really appreciate it. Thank you.

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 6:52 pm #

      Thank YOU for passing me and my words along!

  205. SunflowerHW March 6, 2011 at 7:08 pm #

    Don’t worry. I saw a sign in Joe’s Crabshack that says “Housework makes you ugly”.

  206. hayadith March 6, 2011 at 7:12 pm #

    i do my laundry everyday..because else, I ‘ll end up doing these 5 things u did..

    anyway, nice post..

  207. lifeintheboomerlane March 6, 2011 at 7:18 pm #

    Hilarious. The only time I enjoy cleaning is when I chase after the cat with the vacuum nozzle.

  208. Rachel March 6, 2011 at 7:32 pm #

    well i do a stage six and seven six finish:is clean and neatly find a place for everything then seven is doubt cus by the next working day its back to the way it was and i doubt that i even cleaned it

  209. Sabera March 6, 2011 at 8:12 pm #

    Hilarious! I just cleaned my whole home yesterday and totally relate 🙂 Hate hate cleaning the home. Every time I even think of hiring someone else to do it for me I’m discouraged by the high cost! Until I win the lottery I guess I’ll just have to do the horrid task myself… *sigh*

  210. jessicaber March 6, 2011 at 9:21 pm #

    Well, I mopped my mudroom and kitchen floors today, vaccumed under the couch cushions and did a bunch of dishes so I am feeling a little bit better now.

  211. TweeCo March 6, 2011 at 9:41 pm #

    haha,funny!so true, I even never recognize I have that emotional change throughout the process.

  212. Nicole M. Evans March 6, 2011 at 9:50 pm #

    Haha! I go through these stages exactly. I thought I was the only one! […Especially on Stages 3 and 4. :S]

    • Oh My Words! March 6, 2011 at 10:50 pm #

      You’re definitely not alone! I love how all these comments have proved it!

  213. TehLinds March 6, 2011 at 10:55 pm #

    This is true! Whenever I clean this is usually everything I do! Funny!

  214. Too Boots March 6, 2011 at 11:00 pm #

    I am very protective of my clutter. So much that even my closest friends have never been to the second floor (the messiest) of my house. I could hire a weekly cleaning service, but alas, realize I would have to clean my house before I could have them step foot through the front door….

  215. Sharp March 6, 2011 at 11:02 pm #

    sounds painfully familiar

  216. A. Irvin March 7, 2011 at 12:02 am #

    LOL! I completely identify with this post! My plan for the weekend was to clean my room, as well as my workspace (desk and the floor around it) – neither of which was completed. However, I have “caught up” with TV watching, phone calls and shopping. Oh, well . . . maybe next weekend 😉

  217. makrome March 7, 2011 at 12:04 am #

    “This mess is a place” is definitely what I think every morning looking at my flat! 🙂

  218. MaiBao March 7, 2011 at 12:48 am #

    I’m literally laughing out loud as I’m reading this. I’ve done this too too many times.

  219. vanimator March 7, 2011 at 1:24 am #

    Simply hilarious and very true indeed. Avoidance is a major drawback.
    Thanks for this hilarious article.


  220. Mallorie March 7, 2011 at 1:35 am #

    Lol, big lol. 😀
    So funny, but true. ^^
    I Like your blog.

  221. smilescotland March 7, 2011 at 1:50 am #

    My whole life can be broken down in this way – thanks for enlightening!

  222. richannkur March 7, 2011 at 2:17 am #

    Such a cute article…. everybody does this some or the other time.

  223. scrambled7 March 7, 2011 at 3:29 am #

    Cleaning is a pain when you do it alone, but with friends, it can be great fun. :d
    Helps me all the time. 🙂

    • Oh My Words! March 7, 2011 at 2:31 pm #

      is that like a “Misery loves company” kind of thing?
      Yes, as long as the friends don’t add to the distractions, it would be nice not to tidy up all by your lonesome. 🙂

  224. Tove March 7, 2011 at 4:34 am #

    This describes me 100% when I ‘attempt’ to clean. I had this crazy idea that all women love cleaning. It’s fantastic to see that I am not the only one who does not.

    Fantastic blog by the way!

  225. thesecretgirlforever March 7, 2011 at 5:35 pm #

    hahaha. this is so true!! congrats on FP!!

  226. YoungWidow26 March 7, 2011 at 8:50 pm #

    LOL love this. That is exactly what I do. Or would do anyway, if I ever got past the Avoidance Stage! haha. I will be sharing this with friends!!

    • Oh My Words! March 7, 2011 at 10:10 pm #

      The Avoidance Stage is a toughy! Thanks for passing my words along!

  227. mybakingempire March 7, 2011 at 9:43 pm #

    My mother got me a decorative tile for my kitchen which reads “my idea of cleaning is to sweep the room with a glance.” It’s like you wrote this post about me, I have major cleaning anxiety.

    • Oh My Words! March 7, 2011 at 10:19 pm #

      that’s a nice saying to keep near and dear to you 🙂

  228. Right Thinking March 8, 2011 at 7:29 am #

    I’m helping the wife clean today!

  229. halfwayto50 March 8, 2011 at 8:33 pm #

    Oh my gosh I hate to clean! I thought I would clean more once I got married and bought my own house, but it didn’t help. Turns out I’m just lazy!

  230. Maisha March 9, 2011 at 4:28 am #

    i just don’t like cleaning. PERIOD

  231. jessicaber March 9, 2011 at 9:30 am #

    any suggestions on how I can get my boyfriend to help his and my son and I clean the apartment?

    • Oh My Words! March 9, 2011 at 10:08 am #

      bribes and breaks always help! Otherwise–maybe someone else will have tips? I can barely motivate myself 🙂

  232. deecosta March 10, 2011 at 12:55 am #

    So true…

  233. Yelly March 11, 2011 at 12:47 pm #

    I’m like that about my ironing. I have a chair with a pile of clothes and a Me To You Tatty Teddy on top. As long as Teddy doesn’t get suffocated, I think my chair is still okay. It’s not really…I think I should stop writing about it and start fixing the chair and putting the clothes away…yeah that’s what I’ll do…in a little bit…

  234. Ed Williams March 14, 2011 at 10:00 am #

    HYSTERICAL (and oh so true!) Great read.

  235. Great post! Sounds so familiar though. I go through this most weekends when it’s that ‘cleaning’ time. I’ve created those piles and hid them under the bed and in closets too!


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    […] Optimism This isn't that bad. I can totally do this. I'll put some peppy music on, pull my hair back, push up my sleeves. I'll bet I can get this done in 2 hours, tops. I am good! Devastation MY. GOD. There's no end to the mess! Who am I kidding? I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this. Where did it all come from? Where do I put it? Why do I have one red shoelace? Why am I keeping every birthday card I've ever gotten? Ewww–why is there s … Read More […]

  4. The 5 Stages of Cleaning (via Oh My Words!) « Hailey's Days - March 5, 2011

    […] Optimism This isn't that bad. I can totally do this. I'll put some peppy music on, pull my hair back, push up my sleeves. I'll bet I can get this done in 2 hours, tops. I am good! Devastation MY. GOD. There's no end to the mess! Who am I kidding? I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this. Where did it all come from? Where do I put it? Why do I have one red shoelace? Why am I keeping every birthday card I've ever gotten? Ewww–why is there s … Read More […]

  5. A Quick Update « The Quest not to be Homeless - March 5, 2011

    […] Before I forget, I found this is a perfect description of the cleaning process. It’s what usually happens to me when I try to clean my house. I fail badly – the 5 stages of cleaning. […]

  6. The 5 Stages of Cleaning (via Oh My Words!) | crossings of metro lines. - March 5, 2011

    […] Optimism This isn't that bad. I can totally do this. I'll put some peppy music on, pull my hair back, push up my sleeves. I'll bet I can get this done in 2 hours, tops. I am good! Devastation MY. GOD. There's no end to the mess! Who am I kidding? I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this. Where did it all come from? Where do I put it? Why do I have one red shoelace? Why am I keeping every birthday card I've ever gotten? Ewww–why is there s … Read More […]

  7. The 5 Stages of Cleaning (via Oh My Words!) | Ella's Comfort - March 5, 2011

    […] Optimism This isn't that bad. I can totally do this. I'll put some peppy music on, pull my hair back, push up my sleeves. I'll bet I can get this done in 2 hours, tops. I am good! Devastation MY. GOD. There's no end to the mess! Who am I kidding? I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this. Where did it all come from? Where do I put it? Why do I have one red shoelace? Why am I keeping every birthday card I've ever gotten? Ewww–why is there s … Read More […]

  8. Cleaning Day? Does this Sound Familiar… « 24atHeart - March 5, 2011

    […] MY. GOD. There’s no end to the mess! Who am I kidding?…Read More […]

  9. Cleaning in Woman’s eyes… « English Mos Def - March 5, 2011

    […] […]

  10. The 5 Stages of Cleaning (via Oh My Words!) | Windy City Wilderness - March 5, 2011

    […] Optimism This isn't that bad. I can totally do this. I'll put some peppy music on, pull my hair back, push up my sleeves. I'll bet I can get this done in 2 hours, tops. I am good! Devastation MY. GOD. There's no end to the mess! Who am I kidding? I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this. Where did it all come from? Where do I put it? Why do I have one red shoelace? Why am I keeping every birthday card I've ever gotten? Ewww–why is there s … Read More […]

  11. The 5 Stages of Cleaning « Oh My Words! « That Just Happened. - March 5, 2011

    […] The 5 Stages of Cleaning « Oh My Words!. […]

  12. The 5 Stages of Cleaning (via Oh My Words!) « chunter's factor analysis - March 5, 2011

    […] Everybody knows this is true, but I’ve never seen it spelled out so plainly… Optimism This isn't that bad. I can totally do this. I'll put some peppy music on, pull my hair back, push up my sleeves. I'll bet I can get this done in 2 hours, tops. I am good! Devastation MY. GOD. There's no end to the mess! Who am I kidding? I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this. Where did it all come from? Where do I put it? Why do I have one red shoelace? Why am I keeping every birthday card I've ever gotten? Ewww–why is there s … Read More […]

  13. The 5 Stages of Cleaning (via Oh My Words!) « - March 5, 2011

    […] Optimism This isn't that bad. I can totally do this. I'll put some peppy music on, pull my hair back, push up my sleeves. I'll bet I can get this done in 2 hours, tops. I am good! Devastation MY. GOD. There's no end to the mess! Who am I kidding? I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this. Where did it all come from? Where do I put it? Why do I have one red shoelace? Why am I keeping every birthday card I've ever gotten? Ewww–why is there s … Read More […]

  14. The 5 Stages of Cleaning « Oh My Words! « Knock, knock, Knocking on 40's door - March 6, 2011

    […] The 5 Stages of Cleaning « Oh My Words!. […]

  15. The 5 Stages of Cleaning (via Oh My Words!) « fashioncounter - March 6, 2011

    […] Optimism This isn't that bad. I can totally do this. I'll put some peppy music on, pull my hair back, push up my sleeves. I'll bet I can get this done in 2 hours, tops. I am good! Devastation MY. GOD. There's no end to the mess! Who am I kidding? I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this. Where did it all come from? Where do I put it? Why do I have one red shoelace? Why am I keeping every birthday card I've ever gotten? Ewww–why is there s … Read More […]

  16. The 5 Stages of Cleaning « Oh My Words! | Collectables - March 6, 2011

    […] via The 5 Stages of Cleaning « Oh My Words!. […]

  17. The 5 Stages of Cleaning (via Oh My Words!) | dearfolksie - March 8, 2011

    […] Optimism This isn't that bad. I can totally do this. I'll put some peppy music on, pull my hair back, push up my sleeves. I'll bet I can get this done in 2 hours, tops. I am good! Devastation MY. GOD. There's no end to the mess! Who am I kidding? I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this. Where did it all come from? Where do I put it? Why do I have one red shoelace? Why am I keeping every birthday card I've ever gotten? Ewww–why is there s … Read More […]

  18. I Want a Guy Who Wears a Fedora « Oh My Words! - March 16, 2011

    […] I couldn’t find my hat. It could have gotten sucked into a closet during one of my cleaning fits, but I suspect it was re-sold or donated. In that case, there may be a guy out there in the world […]

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